Guilt Ridden Page 6

  “There. Now you have my number.”

  “How’d you get mine?”

  He smiled, and heat from earlier in the evening fused into his look. From her gaze stuck to his mouth, she noticed. “Despite what you saw this weekend, I’m not all muscle.”

  With a nod, he walked out, her soft chuckle echoing after him.

  Chapter Five

  Ten more miles and they’d arrive at Normandy. Kami loosened her hand around the wheel. This weekend’s hour-long trip to her former in-laws pumped more dread through her than normal. They were going to find out that she was trying to buy her mom’s land. And they’d have an opinion. They always had an opinion.

  She managed to keep her intentions under wrap. If her mom hadn’t told anyone, and Travis hadn’t told anyone, then it was still between the three of them. But Kambria was the wild card, and if she spilled a secret, she’d also backtrack and let out that she’d been asked not to say anything. Then Ben’s parents would lose trust, thinking Kami was keeping secrets from them. For her daughter, she strove to keep a smooth and open relationship.

  Kambria thumbed her phone off. “So what will this family reunion be like?”

  “You’ll get to play with your cousins.” Ben’s sisters had moved out of state and Kambria rarely got to play with their kids. “Some of your dad’s aunts and uncles will be there. You’ll play games, and—”

  “I don’t understand why you won’t come.”

  Because I wasn’t invited. “I’ll pick up some extra hours. I didn’t know your dad’s family very well.” Because they hadn’t been interested in knowing her, just her daughter. And she wasn’t working at the diner or bartending. She was grabbing her work gloves and heading out to her mom’s.

  “Has Travis called yet?”

  She glanced in the rearview mirror. Kambria lacked all the mutinous attitude she usually had when she asked about Austin. Actually, she never asked about Austin. Must be the horse riding that gave Travis extra points.

  “I missed his call earlier this week.”

  “Did you call back?”

  “No,” she answered evenly. “I’ve been busy.”

  They approached the modest ranch-style house of her in-laws. Ben’s dad was outside mowing the lawn. He shut the mower off and waved.

  Kami parked. Kambria rushed out, throwing her grandpa a wave and running into the house.

  Forcing a smile to her face, she got out. Ben’s mom didn’t come out and greet her. That was nothing new. She chatted a few minutes, then moseyed back to her car, trying not to seem too eager to leave.

  Finally, she made it home. She gathered her phone and wallet and trudged inside.

  Glancing at the screen, she fumbled her items. Shit, she missed Travis’s call.

  Her belly clenched. Should she call him back? What’d he want? She could easily pick his brain about what the Walker Five had planned for her property. They could meet for a bite to eat. Or he could come over.

  Justin was an international whatever. Brigit was going to be a doctor. Travis was already a different type of doctor. His mom liked to brag. And one time, she’d overheard Travis’s dad ask hers if he’d been to STU. Stupid University.

  She stood, chewing her lower lip and staring at her phone in her palm.

  She dumped everything on the counter and went into her room. It was time to do her own research.

  ***

  “Hi, Kami. I’ll be out repairing some fence on the northwest pastures, so if you need a hand, just let me know.”

  She hit replay.

  “Hi, Kami. I’ll be out repairing some fence on the northwest pastures, so if you need a hand, just let me know.”

  Before she’d crawled into bed, she’d swung out and grabbed her phone. Now it was morning, and she hadn’t budged from her warm cocoon.

  She hit replay. Each time Travis’s voice rumbled her name, an uncoiling in her belly threatened to move south.

  She wasn’t accustomed to sexual frustration. After Ben died, she hadn’t been interested. Then, after her move home, she’d started thinking about an identity that didn’t revolve around being a widow and well, there was Austin. Single as always. At least he made sure he was single when she was willing.

  That was one redeeming trait with him.

  Why was Travis so willing to help her? She wasn’t so desperate that she’d take him any way she could get him. She didn’t want to be his stepping stone, or worse, his regret that he’d settled. Why would a successful, intelligent businessman slash scientist be interested in her?

  Sex.

  She’d almost scaled Travis’s body and latched onto his tonsils when he kissed her.

  She frowned at the ceiling. The kiss was splendid. But she started unraveling her misgivings behind the action. The reason why Ben had appealed to her in the first place.

  They had their fling through football season, he kept asking her out, and when her pregnancy test had a plus sign that might as well have been ten feet tall, he’d been so thrilled. They’d have deep conversations about raising kids, future aspirations. It’d even been fun to pick names with him. He insisted on using a spin-off of her name and since a combination of their names didn’t work, they’d settled on Kambria. And that was the thrill of Ben.

  A hot tear rolled out of the corner of her eye. Lazy Saturday mornings with him, discussing what their weekend plans were…cooking breakfast together…taking Kambria to the lake. Their life had revolved around their child and included a stability she hadn’t known before. For the first time, she experienced a relationship that wasn’t all about sex.

  Ultimately, that was why Travis was off limits. He might be smarter than her, he might have more money, but if he thought sharing her bed was the start of a solid relationship… Well, she deserved better.

  ***

  Travis wiped sweat off on his shoulder as Cash positioned the wire, the last on at least a football field length of fence they were repairing. Since they formed the perimeter of the bull pasture, they wanted to ensure it was as secure as possible. He clamped the wire after securing it around the post.

  “Finally.” Cash took of his hat and wiped his brow. “It’s a hot bitch out here today.”

  “At least there’s a nice breeze.” Travis tossed the tool into the box and dug out his phone.

  Blank screen. He scowled and tucked it back into his pocket.

  “Dude, is there a hot commodity update on the price of wheat?”

  He glowered at Cash. “We didn’t plant wheat this year.”

  “No kidding?” Cash said sarcastically. “We could’ve shaved an hour off today if you weren’t stopping to check that damn thing all the time.”

  Travis clasped the top of the metal post and put his other hand on his hip. “You and Abbi fighting or what? Or are you two menstruating together?”

  Cash flipped a finger up, surprisingly not his middle finger. “One, I don’t make those jokes around her. Pussy jokes about the cat are a go, PMS jokes—no-go. I learned the hard way.” He looked like he was going to say something, but instead bent to collect all the items scattered around the rectangular toolbox.

  “Talk to me, Cash.”

  “It’s nothing, man.”

  Cash chewed on the inside of his cheek. Travis gave up and was turning away when he spoke. “Your mom called me the other day.”

  “What? Why? Is something wrong?” Travis talked his heart rate back down. Dillon was getting married this summer and Cash was getting married in the fall. It was likely a wedding question that Travis would be clueless about.

  “No, not that at all.”

  “Good. Good. Then why are you reluctant to tell me?”

  “She’s worried that you haven’t mentioned dating again.”

  Travis bristled. “And?”

  “She said she’d like to see you bring a date to the wedding and asked if I knew anyone.”

  Travis gritted his teeth. Mom was hoping to take advantage of Cash’s womanizing past. “Aw, hell. I’m s
orry, Cash.”

  Cash shrugged it off, but his shoulders were tight. Yeah, he’d been insulted. “I get it. They aren’t here to see how I’ve changed. Anyway, I told them that no fucking way was I getting involved in your love life.”

  “Verbatim?”

  “I’m not stupid. But I was clear that I was not going to set you up with anyone.”

  Travis sighed and rolled his neck. Why, Mom? He’d be mildly irritated if he hadn’t run across Kami. But he had, and he wanted things to progress naturally, without pressure. What would Phil and Della think when he started dating? They were barely surviving without Michelle. Their son wasn’t around. What if they felt they were losing him again?

  He scrubbed his face. Truthfully, Phil and Della were a major reason he hadn’t been interested in dating. He dropped his hands and his gaze landed on an old rusted pickup towing a flatbed trailer bumping along in the neighboring pasture.

  Kami’s mom was never out in the fields. Had she tracked him down for a reason?

  Cash pushed off the tailgate. “When’d Pam English get a trailer?”

  “Right? When’d she get anything new?” She certainly wouldn’t start now. Was she actually going to help her daughter?

  “I can’t believe Kami thinks she can turn that mess into a working ranch. I guess we’ll have to wait another year or two for her to figure out she needs to sell.”

  “What makes you so sure Kami is going to fail?”

  Cash scoffed. “When has that girl stuck with anything in her life?”

  Travis shot him a glare. “People change.”

  Cash raised his hands in defense. “Sorry. I forgot how you were about her.” He dropped his arms, and they watched the pickup veer off to the mound of scrap metal. The profile in the pickup wasn’t the weathered grimace of Pam English but an intent young woman with a swinging ponytail.

  Kami had her mom’s truck and intended to tackle the scrap pile. By herself? Was she going to drop the trailer and go back for some kind of heavy equipment to help her load any of that?

  “Travis?”

  “Hmm?” But Cash didn’t elaborate. Travis glanced at him and scowled. “What?”

  “Are you…interested in her? Dude. I don’t need another round of trying to cheer you up every time you see her with another guy.”

  Travis ran his tongue across the front of his teeth. Don’t lose my temper. “She’s not like that.”

  “I wasn’t saying that. Fuck, Travis. Me, of all people, know better than that. I was talking about how she dropped out of rodeo after her dad died. How she jetted when she got pregnant, then rebounded back when her husband died. I’m talking about how when her situation gets rough, she gets going. And turning that neglected acreage into something not only usable, but profitable, is going to be rough to say the least.”

  When Cash said it like that… But he still didn’t know Kami. He was older than them and thankfully, she’d been wrapped up in Austin during the years Cash was exploring the wonders of sex.

  “She deserves a chance. It’s her home.”

  Cash shot him a look. “That place isn’t fit to be a home for anything.” He ambled to the truck and climbed inside.

  Travis turned to follow, but stopped. He twisted back to look at Kami. She’d gotten out and was wandering around the piles of old cars. He couldn’t make out her expression, but it had to be hopeless.

  He jogged to the pickup, opened the passenger door, and grabbed his water bottle and lunch bag. “I’ll see you later.”

  Cash draped an arm over the steering wheel and cocked an eyebrow.

  “She deserves to have a little help. She’s lost a lot and she’s trying to save what she has left.”

  “And you two are going to throw an entire car frame from the seventies onto that trailer?” Cash blew out a sigh and rolled his eyes toward him, then back out the windshield. “Dammit, fine. I’ll swing by Aaron’s and grab the loader. But what the hell’s she going to do with a fully loaded trailer?”

  “I know. I’ll talk to her.” He shut the door and slapped the frame. Cash drove off.

  Travis threaded his way through the pasture. He reached the newly repaired fence and carefully separated two rows of wire to wedge himself through. Kami had disappeared between two old cars. As he got closer, her mutters grew clearer.

  “What the hell were you thinking, Mom? Dammit, this is such a mess. What the hell am I supposed to do with all this shit?”

  He rounded the fender of an old Chrysler. “Hey, there.”

  She shrieked and spun around. He jumped back before she started swinging.

  “Travis! I thought you guys left.” She recovered quickly with a stern expression and her hands planted on her hips.

  A smile played over his lips. She was so out of her element. “Cash went to grab the loader.”

  He scanned the mess around him. The sun peeked behind a cloud, throwing shade over them. A metallic smell tinged what should’ve been a lovely open-field scent. He inhaled deeply. Pam must’ve at least had the previous owners rip out the environmental hazards before they towed their junk here. He detected no undertones of oil or gas.

  “What do we have?” he asked.

  “We don’t have anything. I have my mom’s bad decisions to clean up.”

  “Kami—”

  She shook her head. “This is not your problem.”

  The sun escaped its block, the bright light making her eyes shine like a stout ale. She squinted at the sky and abruptly stomped to her truck.

  He stayed on her heels. “It’s not, but we were ready to clear this out anyway.”

  The truck door screeched as she ripped it open. She dug around inside, giving him the sweetest view of her rounded ass in her worn jeans. A hat was in her hands when she popped back out. Shoving it on her head and threading her ponytail through the opening, she scrutinized him.

  He was transported back fifteen years to when a young Kami rode horse with her dad to his house so their parents could argue about some perceived grievance on her dad’s part.

  She crossed her arms, making her plain gray T-shirt bond with her cleavage. As if the last week hadn’t been hard enough to talk his body down from, this image was going to cost him sleep.

  “The thing is, Travis, eventually I have to learn how to save my own ass.”

  He ruminated over that. She had a point, but it didn’t negate all the obstacles she faced. “I get it, but how are you going to do this all with a trailer?”

  “I’ll load what I can and dump it before I have to get the trailer back. This’ll give me a good idea of what equipment I’ll need.”

  “Wait, the trailer’s rented?”

  She nodded, a guarded expression overtaking her determination.

  “So you’re paying by the day.”

  She nodded again.

  “And you’re okay leaving this sit in your yard and paying until Monday?”

  “Of course not. It’s going back today.”

  “They close at one.”

  She blinked and glanced at the trailer. “No, he assured me he’s open until four today.”

  “Not the equipment rental place, the scrap yard.”

  Her mouth dropped open. A delicate line formed across her forehead. “Then I guess I dump it tomorrow.”

  He hated heaping bad news onto her. “They’re not open on Sunday. Don’t you work all day Monday? Because they’re only open until five.”

  She nodded, her eyes glistened with a hint of moisture. Dammit. Did she feel like he was attacking her, proving how she wasn’t cut out for this?

  “None of us do this alone.” He kept his tone soft, encouraging. “Cash’ll be here in a half an hour and we’ll cherry pick what we can. It’s only ten. I bet we could even get a trailer full or two to the dump. And while you return it to the rental store, we’ll load up one of our trailers and I’ll just go Monday and get rid of it. This pasture will be checked off.”

  Her lips formed a stubborn line. For a moment, he feare
d she’d turn him down. “Isn’t he bitter about your missed opportunity?”

  A shadow crossed his face. “There’ll be another one.”

  “I guess that’ll work.”

  He’d rejoice, but she probably gave in because the cost of keeping the trailer until she could unload and return it next Saturday terrified her. The amount of money she had squirreled away was likely dedicated completely to this endeavor. And yeah, he thought her chances were slim, and that made him resolute about not wasting her money.

  He smiled. “Great. Now, what do we have?”

  Chapter Six

  Kami stood several yards away from the loader as Cash and Travis maneuvered the last hunk of old car onto a flatbed. Exposed earth and dead grass outlined where all the junk had been for years. Her next project was to tackle the top half of a school bus in the adjacent pasture. Her dad dragged it out there, claiming it was a shelter for calves, but it was an eyesore.

  The car was placed. She stepped in to secure it down. Cash backed the loader away. Travis waved him off. The drone of the engine faded into the distance as Cash took it back to Aaron’s. Travis said he’d keep the scrap pile loaded and drop it off in the morning. She had an hour to trade vehicles at the house and run home to meet Kambria when her grandparents dropped her off.

  Spending her weekend with two of Moore’s most handsome farmers shouldn’t have left an uneasy pit in her stomach. But the evaluating looks Cash gave her and the tense way he interacted with Travis left her wondering what was between them. Did it have to do with her? Did Cash know about the kiss? Was it her reputation?

  She didn’t know Cash very well. He’d been a couple grades ahead of her and had his own stories told about him, but from what she heard, he’d settled down with an out-of-town girl. Was he all righteous because he’d been tamed and now the focus was on her?

  Her phone rang. She shucked her gloves and dug it out of her pocket.

  Ben’s parents? “Hi, Martha. Is everything okay?”

  “Hey, Mom!”

  Some of her foreboding drained away when her daughter responded instead.

  “Hey, sweetie. Are you on your way back?”